We have been asked to do this page about
nasties in Cyprus. Of course the official line would be that "we don't have
any" but of course we do, we all do, so below you will find a description and maybe some advice
on how to avoid or deal with them. To be honest, unless you get on a
roll, where things run in sequence and compound with each event,there are not very many nasties in
Cyprus, especially in comparison with other places. If you know of anything you wish to
put here,
let us know.
Nasties Name |
Characteristics |
How to avoid or deal with. |
Mosquito |
Annoying buzzing noise, emitted by pregnant
female.
Nasty little
bites. |
In Cyprus we have small electric machines which you can plug into a socket near the
window, pop in a pill which you can buy in most supermarkets, and this keeps them out (supposedly). I find the best way to deal with them is a quick inspection before retiring
with a good old fashioned fly swatter. Or the latest addition to my arsenal
is an electric tennis racquet swatter, they buzz, you zap ! |
Frozen Chips |
Ruins a good meal |
Refuse to accept them.
Ask for real Cyprus potatoes. We grow and export them. |
Mad taxi drivers. |
Heart in mouth effect. |
Ask them to slow down. If they won't, tell them that you are going
to be sick, so could they please stop somewhere with a toilet so you don't mess up the
upholstery. Then call another taxi and specify that you are a nervous passenger. |
Earthquakes |
Shaking ground,
rolly polly sick movement |
Don't panic ! Just move away from tall objects that may fall on you. If you are
indoors, get get outside, or under a strong piece of furniture. Houses in Cyprus are built with
reinforced concrete , supposedly with this problem in mind. When it stops, go to open ground.
There is
often a bigger one after the initial smaller warning. |
| Cockroaches |
Huge brown guys,
endemic and rather like field mice.
|
They are not the small 'gosh it is filthy here' type....they are the
'eek I'm leaving NOW' big flying guys. Misunderstood and harmless they
live in the fields and scuttle across floors. They also live in the drains
and hence are called ' filthy' (Actually it's our filth they are living
in...not known as carriers of disease they are dustmen).
There is a chemical weapon you can use against them called
fly spray,
probably more harmful to you than they are.
|
|
Animal Cruelty & neglect.
|
Most children are taught to fear animals, so
when they get in a position of power - watch out!
Bird decimation
|
Don't look in peoples back yards. If you do and see pitifully
thin, bored dogs... walk away or be prepared to fight it out
with the authorities. There is not normally deliberate cruelty
towards animal from adults, just ignorance, neglect and
distrust.
The birds are not supposed to be lime sticked or glued
anymore, however it still happens, despite protests to the
contrary - If you see it - Report it please - amberopoulia
are those birds.
Hunting season will see men in full battle gear, stalking
hares and hedgehogs in 4x4 comfort.
Most popular shooting spots are just by the signs designating ' nature reserves'
A good way to get rid of unpopular in laws, take 'em shooting. We lose
quite a few people this way each year.
|
|
Bureaucracy |
Drives you insane |
A national pastime. You go to one office, submit the paperwork, then you
are told to go to another office (often in another town) to get another
paper, that office tells you to go to another office (often in another town)
to get another paper, that office tells you to go to another office (often
in another town) to get another paper, that office tells you they are
closed, next day you start again. At the end of 2 weeks like this you are
refused whatever it was you were applying for, either because you were given
wrong information in the first place or the permit you were after doesn't
exist anymore. |
|
Bullshit |
Wastes plenty of time |
When looking for a particular item in the shops, if you ask at the door,
you will be told 'Yes we have it.' When you get inside (possibly after
coffee) you will be told' Ah, yes it is coming in next week. I tried it with
camels - I asked 15 shops if they had camel. 12 of them had them coming in
next week ! I am still waiting. |
|
Artisans |
More mess than they are worth |
Get in a plumber, decorator, electrician, builder etc and you will be
left with an incredible mess. The original job may be as simple as putting
in a new plug or decorating the bit after they put in the new plug. The
result may be a wonky, diagonal plug with an ill fitting top plate, your
furniture and pictures splattered with paint spots and the drill hole debris
etc to clear up afterwards. |
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